Provision

I have been looking for a job for a long time.  For 3 years, I’ve felt I badly needed one.  In January while on a weekend retreat, I was given the opportunity to be prayed over by an anointed team of two men and as they prayed I noticed that the word job was quickly replaced in their prayer with the word provision.  I knew this was significant.  It was not a word I typically used in conversation, and certainly not one I used in prayer to that point.  It sounded good, but honestly it’s true meaning at that time was somewhat vague.  I need food, I need to keep a roof over my head, I need to take care of my physical needs, my loved ones . . . I need . . . I want . . . and they were praying for provision.  Hmmm . . .

 I used to have a good job.  It provided for me in ways that satisfied me.  It didn’t make me rich, but it kept me from laying awake at night.  It didn’t bless me especially, but it was okay.  It was sensible and safe and I was often happy.  I never prayed for provision.  I had it “under control.”  In the words of Joshua 9:14 “The Israelites sampled their provisions but did not inquire of the LORD.”  I didn’t inquire of the Lord either.  He had more for me, but I didn’t ask.  I was “handling it” okay.  We settle for okay a lot, don’t we?  When I relocated 1000 miles from all that was familiar, I realized a dream in doing so, but didn’t find a job.  Still haven’t.  However, I’ve found “work” and it’s another dream come true.  It does not seem to come with a paycheck, yet it blesses me in ways no paycheck ever could.  Still I wonder . . . and so I read Psalm 132:15  “I will bless her with abundant provisions; her poor I will satisfy with food.”  There’s that word again and it comes with a promise . . .  I need to trust Him for my provision.

 Provision?  The dictionary defines it as “supplying something, especially food or other necessities.”  No mention of money . . . but I’m certain it falls somewhere on the list of “other necessities.”  The Lord is showing me that my needs are being met and will continue to be for He knows what they are far better than I do and exceeds my limited expectations in His abundance.  I am finally learning that provision is about far greater things than money and that for me, as also shown in the dictionary definition, the word money doesn’t really have the importance I thought it would.  I have come to know that the Lord’s provision and His amazing love is more than enough “for I know that through your prayers and God’s provision of the Spirit of Jesus Christ what has happened to me will turn out for my deliverance.”  Philippians 1:19.  Amen.  Come, Holy Spirit!

Advertisements

8 Responses to Provision

  1. seahall says:

    He will provide!! 🙂

    Like

  2. beegraziani says:

    When I was 36-years-old (my children were 7, 10 and 12), I became totally disabled because of a spinal bone infection. I have not worked since that day, over fifteen years ago. It was quite a struggle (single mom with no child support) but God gave me strength to persevere. I will pray for you, Martha! God bless you.

    Like

    • Thank you! He is leading me. I believe that He’s been leading me for quite some time now in a certain direction, but I wasn’t willing to go there thinking I can’t make a living, ie earn money doing that, but when I finally stopped fighting Him and went with it, all I can say is that while I have no idea where income needed is likely to come from, I am soooooooo over the top blessed now that I’m (hopefully) listening and following. I’m excited by opportunities that make no sense to me, but I have to trust Him and when I do, the worries become far less heavy and the joy is amazing! This is why I write about the tough things as well as the other blessings in my life. I know I am not alone in facing change and facing unexpected joy by setting aside my carrying the load myself and by surrendering to Him.

      Like

  3. Ashley says:

    I love this, Martha. Definitely hits right on about what we were talking about at the contemplative service the other night. For some reason when I was reading this it brought me back to a reading I found during my daily office a few days ago. It was all about how Christ didnt finish his suffering here and that we all continue to suffer for “The Church” since we are part of Christ and that our reward is waiting for us in Heaven. Im not sure if this is significant to you right now, but it popped in my head, so I thought I would share.
    Having said that, Jesus makes all things work out for our good and for His glory!

    Like

    • Thank you Ashley! I can totally relate to what you’re saying. This has been a difficult time for a lot of us and for me I would also have to say that it’s also been an AMAZING time because it forced me to change and grow in ways I’d never have considered when I thought I could handle life without surrendering to the Lord. I’ve come to know Him personally and if it takes a “crisis” in life to make that happen, it’s worth it every time!

      Like

  4. I listed this post on a blog directory. I’m listed on a number of them and this one I am referring to is secular. The comment suggested that following the Lord’s path and surrendering to His will was taking the easy way out. He suggested that it was, in fact, an excuse not to find a real job. Really? Easy? Lazy? Um . . . I’m thinking blessed, loved, grace . . . but easy and those other things? No. Still, would any Christian have it any other way?

    Like

  5. The same individual who, in a secular blog directory where this post is linked (see my prior comment here) has now sworn at me for being a Christian. Seems as though we should pray for people like him. If such “fire” in his soul could be for Christ . . .

    Like

%d bloggers like this: